Astrochimp - Transceiver

Fifteen minutes of fame,

but not quite a household name.

Adrift in a rocky sea

the space-faring chimpanzee.

Take your stinking paws off me, you damn dirty ape!

What do I owe to this country?

I’m not even from here.

They imported me from the Cameroons,

west Africa, my proper biosphere.

They put me in these rubber pants

and diapers, how I hate them;

rewarding me with an apple and half an orange,

if I could only speak I would berate them.

They call me Ham, and mad I am.

Spacecraft 5 first class.

I flew alone in my Redstone

now go ahead and kiss

my screwy looking-ass.

Now I cannot wait for nuclear devastation

when the humans let their techno toys

destroy their precious nation

and the simian population

will band together and pronounce

our freedom’s declaration

which the humans shall renounce.

They call me Ham, and mad I am,

first primate in outer space.

Encased in some titanium,

the search planes soon to trace.