Hello Mudder, Hello Fadder - Allan Sherman

+Hello Muddah, Hello Fadduh\n(A Letter From Camp)\nHello Muddah, hello Fadduh,\nHere I am at Camp Granada.\nCamp is very entertaining,\nAnd they say we’ll have some fun if it stops raining.\nI went hiking with Joe Spivey.\nHe developed poison ivy.\nYou remember Leonard Skinner.\nHe got ptomaine poisoning last night after dinner.\nAll the counselors hate the waiters,\nAnd the lake has alligators.\nAnd the head coach wants no sissies,\nSo he reads to us from something called Ulysses.\nNow I don’t want this should scare ya,\nBut my bunk mate has malaria.\nYou remember Jeffrey Hardy.\nThey’re about to organize a searching party.\nTake me home, oh Muddah, Fadduh,\nTake me home, I hate Granada,\nDon’t leave me out here in the forest, where\nI might get eaten by a bear.\nTake me home, I promise I will not make noise,\nOr mess the house with other boys.\nOh please don’t make me stay,\nI’ve been here one whole day.\nDearest Fadduh, darling Muddah,\nHow’s my precious little Bruddah?\nLet me come home if you miss me.\nI would even let Aunt Bertha hug and kis me.\nWait a minute, it stopped hailing.\nGuys are swimming, guys are sailing.\nPlaying baseball, gee that’s better.\nMuddah, Fadduh, kindly disregard this letter!